by Adapt Training and Development
If you spend any time with middle schoolers, you have probably heard them pronounce something as “awkward.” I was reminded of this recently when I read a piece by author and educator Rachel Simmons about back-to-school. She was chatting with her daughter about making new friends and her daughter dismissed her ideas as (you guessed it) awkward. She writes, “…our job as parents is to remind our kids that being uncomfortable is a feature, not a bug, of life.”
At the risk of becoming one of those older people who preface everything with “in my day,” I am going on record as saying I worry that technology is depriving our kids of the opportunity to feel awkward and survive. Who else remembers needing to call people’s house phones and talk to their parents in the service of asking if so and so could come to the phone? Awkward. Maybe those same parents scolded you for calling too late. Who remembers when we ended relationships in person (or at least over the phone before text and email existed)? Awkward.
Unfamiliar situations are awkward. Trying something new is awkward. Making a new friend is awkward, whether you are 14 or 44. Admitting you don’t know something is awkward. Going back to the office after years of remote work is awkward. Dating after divorce or sobriety is awkward. Feeling awkward means we are feeling vulnerable and taking risks. We are putting ourselves in territory that is unfamiliar. What could be more normal than feeling uncomfortable with this?
The researcher, writer, speaker and social worker, Brene Brown, is famous for ending her podcasts with the line, “stay awkward, brave and kind.” In many interviews, she embraces the awkward moments and the moments of showing up with vulnerability and courage. If you’re interested, you can listen to an episode of her Dare to Lead podcast on “The Great Awkward” here.
Finally, I think of “awkward” as a feeling, rather than a trait, but this article from Inc.com on how being socially awkward can be awesome is a good one.